the most interesting time of the year

today is my last day in Svishtov for this year - i'm in my room drinking coffee and finishing my things...decided to write about things that happened recently now - it's better to do it when i'm in good mood:)

weeks after ACT were really crazy - so many emotions, tons of work, little sleep, problems...
after the moments i was down the real challenges and fun came - i went on a lot of company meetings with newies, we organized a conference (it's funny how relaxed everyone was till the last moment:) at that time i felt once again how cool is to be LCP! going back i'd never changed my decision!
then applications for MC came - so many doubts, energy and sleepless nights to fill it in the best way...so many dreams of how it'll look like...one amazing year in Sofia... Cool ppl applied - that motivated me more...even cooler ppl supported me by writing an endorsement (it's so nice to read good things about you)or just said "Good luck"
then time for conference came - crazy three days of preparation...not sleeping, great challenges with communication:)
somewhere here another challenge appeared - a really cool one - these stolen moments with you saved me of nervous breakdown:) thank you...
the conference was cool - great idea - great chair - great faci team - happy realizations for me and my team:) hope now we'll make them come true!
and presentations and Q&A came - expected to be harder, speech prepared during brakes and lunches on the conferences, positive feedback after that -> cool feeling
but...i said things ppl didn't like to hear - amazing change in attitude towards me...i still cannot understand how ppl can have so wrong idea of themselves...taking things personally as always (thought it changed somehow)
then long useless talks and gossiping - the most unprofessional way of doing decision
Felt really proud of my EB team - they showed attitude and behaved as real AIESECers!
parties where leaders of the organization sit outside, smoking and drinking beer like pensioners...facis in their room...i cannot understand this - as we don't enjoy being in AIESEC...
OC team - most of them newies disappointed of the EBs of AIESEC in Bulgaria and i don't know what to say...
last morning i realized what's going to happen...felt awful...the only ppl i could talk was my EB and some members of MC...strange behavior of others...smiling as if they apologize for sth:)
hm...then GA on Monday - one of the moments i was ashamed i'm in AIESEC (happy there were no externals)
what i expected happened...no surprise...tons of emotions...lots of ppl shaking my hand and telling stupid things, saying "sorry" (for what!?!)
then GA continues and 3 LCs sit on the back rows and nobody ask them what is their opinion...AIESEC in Bulgaria took several strategic decisions without even asking 3 LCs - we elected MCP, voted MC members, elected controller (from the second try:), changed the internal rules (according to what is suitable for certain LCs), elected BoA...at this moment i felt like part of the furnitures in the room not like the leader of one of the LCs...wanted to go out and never come back to this place...but stayed
then decided to ask for feedback from those who didn't supported me - no comment
after this - nice coffee with Steli, Ilio, Blago and Yassar
then travel back to Svishtov, self-reflection and really nice evening...
now i'm asking myself what i did wrong, what could've been changed...still emotions are strong and cannot be objective...on one hand i'm sure i was right and not going to change my opinion...on the other hand - maybe i was too hard, i didn't make enough effort to explain my point of view, wasn't diplomatic...
don't know - time will show
now i have really cool time with my challenge:) and with the decision for the future - it's so inspiring to know that there are so many opportunities!
last i want to thank ppl who helped me a lot these weeks - Yana, Ilio, Petya, Dancho, Mimi, Nely, Sevi, Steli, Blago, Emo, Eli, Aga, Bobi, Vyara, Adas, Masha, Agus, Malina, Yassar, Iva and Michal.

10 days to decide about future - isn't it cool:)

happy?

I asked myself this question just right now when a classmate asked me in skype how are you? And although today I feel exhausted and a lot of problems occurred I wrote just "I feel great, really happy!" and it was true:)
heh strange thing - still miss so many things I need but overall I feel happy with my life!

wall of commitments

oranges

just wanted to share how much I love oranges - their colour, taste, remind me Christmas and good things:)

wanna be somewhere else

after the conference I have this strange feeling - want to be somewhere else...
first i thought it's due to excitement around ACT - it's every time like that after AIESEC conference. But now 3 days passed and I'm still not feeling comfortable...
I cannot concentrate on my everyday things, all my thoughts are in future (or in ACT)
Thinking of MC, of one year in Sofia, challenging myself...searching for new things, new people
but still - what I do now is the most important and there is no sense going further if your current path is not good
or it's up to me to make it good
I don't know - confusion time
and I was just reading blogs - when someone was so influenced by me I feel strange, confused, great, guilty - so many things
...

what have you done today to make you feel proud

recently I found this great song of Heather Small - putting in the list several time every evening...It somehow appeals to me very much - to my thoughts and feelings...

I look into the window of my mind
Reflections of the fears I know I've left behind
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same

What have you done today to make you feel proud?
It's never too late to try
You could be so many people
If you make that break for freedom

Still so many answers I don't know
Realize that to question is how we grow
So I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same

It's never too late to try
You could be so many people
What have you done today to make you feel proud?

We need a change
Do it today
I can feel my spirit rising
We need a change
So do it today
'Cause I can see a clear horizon

ACT

it would be strange not to write about ACT 2007 - the most amazing conference I've been so far! Although it's two days passed I'm still confused - why it's so hard to back to reality - responsibilities in AIESEC, studies...most of my thoughts are still there...

people I met there motivated me so much - I think I totally changed my concept (see previous posts here:) The international faci team and our beloved chair - really cool people every one different, funny and last but not least - AChiever! It was great to work with you! Maybe for first time I realized the cultural diversity - we were from different countries but still understanding each other (even sometimes without English). I feel proud be part of the team created this conference!
When I remember the funny and great moments I wish to be back to Sofia and be with you again! Lazy bastardinos looking for that prolongatore :))))
Our great team - Jagoda, Zo, Aga, Milojko, Ashad, Dobrila, Iva, Tokrotka and Stanojka!

stop worrying and some update

is there something that can surprise me? for some time I think I become a "nepukist" - it's good not to worry too much about everything:) or I need some new excitement in life? maybe love...

LIST passed - amazing XP, but surprisingly easy for me personally...I can re-think my concept that people cannot motivate me so much - great new ideas and inspiration from the new members, from Aga, from Mitko, from my EB, OCPs...Thank you all!

Now the future for my LC seems better, much better:) And it's time to think about my future...Going back home and not having internet I read sugars from the seminar, and then remembering one post from a friend decided to look at all the sugars I have - wow how many conferences, memories... Some conferences with only one or two sugars, others with many of them. Is it necessary to be popular on an AIESEC conference? Or this shows me my development? What is development in AIESEC? After all we live also non-AIESEC life during this time - it can also develop you somehow...What can be my contribution to the success of the organization in future? Am I result oriented or I prefer to think so?

How to know this without trying? So I'll try!

energy

i wonder how easy i can loose it and soon after this to get it back...sometimes i just need to hear cool song and ready to work till late. in moments that i'm totally tired of everything only music can help:) or something else? for sure it's not people that make me energetic - sounds strange but true. still searching for what makes me tick...

strange weekend

it started with travel to Sofia. Great discussion about life and AIESEC with Dancho in the bus...although it was so cold (I'm wondering why do you pay 13 lv for bus if it's cold)
Coffee and chocolate for breakfast in the MC office - every time I come here I find it very nice to work in such an office :P
Then the GA starts - with delay as usual (why is it usual for some ppl to be late???). From the very beginning it looked random - didn't give an opportunity to Aga to be part of the discussions, searching for compromise even if it's not needed, not prepared people with high self-confidence, people not willing to talk about arguments, so cold that your mind is freezing...At the end - decision that I don't support, but I didn't do almost anything to change it, I was too disappointed...
In the evening - almost planned dinner with Ivo and Nasko to talk about future plans - something nice for the day:)
Then meeting my parents who came to Sofia to meet their mates from University they haven't met for 20 years...strange. But I'm happy I talked with my parents and had some hours without AIESEC
On the morning I feel so energetic that I cant believe...The way back to Svishtov (again cold bus) was time for self-reflection, thinking about strategic development of my LC - I like traveling alone!
EB meeting, GM, rearranging the office, calling candidates, first meal for the day at 23.30....
Just now I received a mail from a friend, very interesting indeed - I need some time to realize what she is advising me...

my days

recently my days looks like this:
get up around 8.30 (almost every time later:P)
go to the office at 10, standing on the info-desk (I didn't expect this will be so energizing, at the end I didn't want to go)
meetings with my EB and OCPs, with the Dean, with Uni newspaper
missing lunch :(
going to some boooring lectures (I start to think if there is anything useful there and whether not to make sth next year)
having dinner :)
go back home and sitting on the pc till late
almost every evening planning to go to disco but still haven't do this...

uncertainty

it's strange that in moments I'm really busy and my life is intense I start to analyze myself...These days I'm questioning myself a lot.

Am I capable of contributing to the success? Is this the right place for me? Is it enough to put your passion and energy or something else is needed? I miss the feedback...

say "no"

It's hard to say "no" even if you know it's the right way...You don't want to offend or to have quarrel with someone. But it's needed! Especially in your work, when you have concrete vision and goals. Every single action on your way towards the goal must be committed to it. Otherwise why are you doing this? To make someone happy? Success doesn't always mean everyone is happy...

Good realization but can I do it?

is it bad to be alone?

It's Saturday evening and I'm alone at home sitting in front of the pc. In the morning I promised to myself only to check the mail for 5 minutes and spend the day in non-AIESEC activities. Almost did it...
But that's not the point. Sometimes I feel really great when I'm alone - I don't miss anyone... Strange may it be but recently it happens often.
Last night I met some classmates from high-school. Hard experience:P At some moments I didn't know what to talk with these people. It's stupid thing, but I really felt like this. I'd prefer to stay at home rather than go to "kruchma" with old classmates. Anyway it was good to see some people...

In Istanbul

IC Pictures - 3

IC Pictures - 2

IC Pictures

3 PAIs



Me and Andi (LCP of Brasov, Romania)



Cooperation Bulgaria-Serbia

Here are some more pictures from IC - I promise to write more but tonight I'm really tired:)

IC '07 Turkey - part four

PAI 07/08 Gabitza with part of the BG delegation




Geri, Aga and me:)


The past two days of the congress just amazed me! I has always been thinking that on IC there are presented complex and hard to understand strategies. It's not like this:) It was surprising and in the same time impressive for me the simple words that Gabitza used to mark the AIESEC way and to present the AI 07/08 Scoreboard... I thought - maybe great things are really simple and that's why we don't see them...

IC '07 Turkey - part three

So - it seems that blogging is not an impossible thing for me:)
The fourth day of IC was actually its first day - opening plenary, amazing Global Village and Official Ceremony.
In the morning all our efforts on creating the Bulgarian roll call seemed to be not waste of time. We did great on the last rehearsal and on the opening plenary despite the challenges with the sound system (yes, that happens even on IC:)
We continued presenting Bulgaria on the GV - amazing event - 100 countries with their traditional food, drinks, music and culture! Here I felt what diversity is!
Finally, we attended official ceremony - a lot of guests, alumni, partners - it's really amazing how our global partners value relationship with AIESEC. One of the highest managers from HP, Alcatel, Electrolux, InBev and many others are here to be with us.



The Chair - Pedros Santos, PAI 03/04

IC '07 Turkey - part two

Hey again,

Today I was thinking how we understand AIESEC and especially the international aspect. Are we open enough to see other cultures, to cooperate? When you're here you realize that the world is not only Europe - there so many great people from Asia or Africa for example. IC is a place that challenges some of my views on AIESEC and diversity in general. I wish to those of you who haven't experienced the international spirit to do it, and not to wait it to come but to work hard for it!

I want to thank to the guys from BG delegation - every day we have many interesting talks about AIESEC in Bulgaria and cool ideas come up. And I enjoy very much practising our roll call :)))

Finally, some interesting facts about IC. It is taking place in the campus of Yeditepe university in Istanbul - really cool venue. The attraction of the place are the dogs - there are more than 20 of them walking free all around the venue - you can see from the pics that they even attend some of the sessions :P


IC dog


Blago, Steli, Yassar and Milenski


Canteen





The venue

IC '07 Turkey - part one

After long long time and after almost everybody was has been saying to me "Man, why don't you write in your blog" I decided to share a little bit with you:) The reason as you can guess is that I'm attending the largest AIESEC event - International Congress, which this year is taking place in Istanbul.
Bulgarian delegation is amazing - Ivo, Steli, Blago, Milenski, Aga, Yassar, Nasko and me:) We had two days of hard preparation in order to present AIESEC in Bulgaria in the best way.

Now we just finished the CEE GN pre-meeting and tomorrow IC itself starts! It's really amazing how motivating the atmosphere is here! In every discussion, session or just on lunches and dinner so many ideas come up to my mind... Even when you hear familiar things (cause we're really well prepared) the perspectives of other delegates are very useful. Although only 3 days have passed I feel some more confident for my role in my LC.

ITTS 2007 in Sofia - what an amazing expereince!

This is my home group from ITTS - Mitko, Maya, Iva, Deni (on the picture), Alex and Poli.

Thank you guys for these amazing 4 days and the unforgettable moments. ITTS was one of the most interesting and inspiring conferences in my AIESEC life and that was mostly because of you:) All the sharing, feedback, jokes and ideas were just great and I'm sure everyone of us learned a lot and had fun a lot:)

The time for my blog has come :)

Finnaly I found some time for myself and decided to create a blog...Strange thing. I have never felt like sharing with others but now I think it's a moment to start:) I don't know if it'll work but it's worth trying, isn't it?

So, hope to find time and inspiration for sharing and I'll be happy to see your comments here:)